Tanya Geisler : Navigating The Impostor Complex and Finding Your Brand of Joy

Tanya Geisler : The Impostor Complex and Finding Your Brand of Joy

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Tanya Geisler is someone I met the day my coaching career began, and has served as a mentor and guiding light for me ever since. Her research and insight on the Impostor Complex (you know, those fraudy feelings) makes her a go-to woman in my life when feeling disconnected from my truth.

She will remind you of your integrity, call you into joy, and make you feel right at home. That’s why I asked Tanya to be a guest mentor in my signature program, Awaken Her Soul.

Speaking with her was as rich as home-made chocolate cake. Listen to our conversation below and get a preview of the deep mentorship waiting for you when you join us in Awaken Her Soul.

If you enjoyed this interview and want more mentorship, join the Awaken Her Soul Waitlist.


More from Tanya:

Tanya Geisler is a Leadership Coach (CPCC) with a penchant for clarity and an abhorrence of the Impostor Complex. She’s worked with thousands of high-performers combat the Impostor Complex so they can step into the starring roles of their lives and achieve their ultimate goals. She has written The 12 Lies of the Impostor Complex (and One Truth)The Joy Pages, created Board of Your Life and the transformational Step into Your Starring Role coaching program, is a writer, has served as contributor and was featured in Canadian Living, and is an in-demand TEDx speaker who talks with great passion about the Impostor Complex, Unshakeable Confidence, personal leadership, on all things joy, meaning and purpose. Her clients include best-selling authors, public speakers, and rockstar world-changers.

It is her indomitable belief that if everyone knew their own unique recipe for their personal brand of joy, they’d hold the key to shining in their life, in their work and in their life’s work. (It really does change everything.)



GET ON THE AWAKEN HER SOUL WAITLIST


Why you can't Avoid your Dark Emotions if you want to Become WHOLE- Vlog

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Why you can't Avoid your Dark Emotions if you want to Become WHOLE- Video Blog

 

What if the ways you feel broken, alone and unworthy are the key to your wholeness?

What if facing the darkest parts of you is the only way to actually live into the light??

I get it, this is not your typical “light and love” self-help message.

This is not a post focusing on your strengths, listing gratitudes or pretending that you’re beyond being human. Cuz I’ve been there, done that, and discovered each of us have a “dark side” we need to embrace if we ever want to feel truly worthy.

Hang with me. This is actually GOOD news.

(Watch full video teaching above)

For the majority of my life, I held value in how good I was. Being well-liked, making others smile, performing, producing, and keeping the appearance of having it all together. “GOOD VIBES ONLY” was my motto. I stayed away from sex and alcohol and anything I’d deemed as “sinful or unconscious.”

But the truth was, I was fragile. There was little depth to my goodness. I always felt like an easter egg bunny that was hollow on the inside. My joy was always one warm day away from melting away and leaving me in a messy shame spiral.

As happy as I seemed, I was actually carrying the weight of years of abuse, ways I felt unlovable, and the shame of the “darker” sides of myself I thought were wrong. And as it is with so many things; what we resist persists.

What we refuse to look at keeps us from becoming an integrated WHOLE person.

There is nothing wrong with focusing on the positive, being grateful and developing healthy habits. It’s important and necessary, but it will not make you whole.

Wholeness comes from taking the descent into the depths with grace, love and acceptance.

 

Wholeness isn’t pretending the dark doesn’t exist, it’s gazing into it, trusting that no matter what you find, you’re worthy.

Now, I am able to see that my goodness lies in the “both, and” of my humanity.

 

Both the light, and the dark.

The positive, and the negative.

The fierceness, and the softness.

The hustle, and the flow.

The body, and the mind.

The sexy, and the soulful.

The pure ,and the nitty gritty.

There is goodness in all of it.

 

 

Wanting to go deeper?

Dive in with my FREE Come Alive Journal Guide. 

Are you a People-Pleaser? An Interview on the Mary Hyatt Show

Are you a People-Pleaser? An Interview on the Mary Hyatt Show

 
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In this interview on the Mary Hyatt Show, Mary and I dive into what a people-pleaser is, how to standing in your power and stop seeking approval from others, and setting boundaries so you can finally use your voice. 

Listen below:

 
 

IN THIS CONVERSATION YOU'LL LEARN:

How to define what it is to be a people pleaser

How to recognize people pleasing behaviors

The art in finding balance in your relationships

Getting really clear on boundary setting

Tips to identify your "safe people"

What happens when you decide to stop being a people pleaser

How to value your voice

Tips on expanding your "feeling vocabulary"

 

Learn to live your truth without fear

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LEARN TO LIVE YOUR TRUTH WITHOUT FEAR

This post was originally send to the Tribe as a letter in early 2017. If you want exclusive letters from me, join + get the best of the best every single week!


What would it feel like to speak your truth without fear?

I'm not talking about you sharing your religion, your politics, or even posting your favorite cause to Facebook. I'm talking about living out the truths deep inside you. I'm talking about the freedom to ask for what you really want; the freedom to express your feelings and your desires without fear of coming across as needy, bitchy, or fearing you'll be rejected. 

I held a Come Alive Gathering the other night with 7 beautiful souls. When I asked the women what "coming alive" meant to them, I got a lot of similar answers: living fully expressed, letting go of expectations and opinions, living less from the "shoulds" and more from truth, less people pleasing, and owning their stories. 

Why do we as women live for others first? 


We spend so much time worried how others perceive us, how we meet the needs of others, if others are angry or upset with us, how to please them, how to look good for them...

It's time to stop living for everyone else's approval and start living for your own.

First, you need to know what's stopping you.  

What if I step out and fail?
What if people think I'm crazy?
What if my partner leaves me? What if my friends leave me?
What if.. what if... what if...

You stay stuck people-pleasing and not expressing yourself because it's comfortable. This doesn't mean you like being where you are, but it's certainly better than the fear of the unknown.

Living from comfort is a sure way you'll never fully own your story and find your power.

Do something this weekend to get out of your comfort zone. Start small! Go to that yoga class alone, ask someone out for coffee, strike up a conversation with a stranger. Get out of your comfort zone and discover how capable and brave and fearless you really are. (Trust me, the fear is worse than just doing it!)

Simply noticing you're dissatisfied is not enough, you must act.

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You must choose to walk the path that you've never walked. Get uncomfortable.

Put yourself out there, be open to being known, set boundaries, step out and do the thing.


You are so capable. Plus, you deserve it.

 


 


This post was originally send to the Tribe as a letter in early 2017. If you want exclusive letters from me, join + get the best of the best every single week!